Questions from my inner voice? gackt is that you?

I got a new Look! yup yup that's me. I am quite tired right now, and stressed to death. I am TRYING to go to japan. I am TRYING to get loans FROM EVERYBODY!... it's so hard to get 1700 from anyone... such a little amount.. arrg, I need to go!

My hair? well lets say now its no mullet....only 10% mullit.. on the side which you can see.

whY?...because i could....

how long did it take?....1 week.

EMO?:....no....w00t w00t.

i am going to the dir en gray concert,....

" janelle you can not effort the japan trip but your going to a concert?'....

Ya i am. because it will cheer me up when everyone lets me down, when i can't get the money, when i will never be able to go to japan.. when i will be stuck in Ottawa my whole life trying to find a job that will pay enough but with rent, bills, food and others.. i will never be able to go, because you can't save in this world..
I DON'T WANT MY DREAMS ON A STRING INFRONT OF ME!.

come on world, let this poor black/native litter student get a brake...

Same old things are happening..

i will be moving December 10 2006 to a friend house for 2 months..
"why not ask them for the money, their rich arnt they?"..

I hardly know them! why would they lend it to me anyway?...idot.

These questions ^ are my inner voice.

bah!, on another note..

I can be Me again

without the wierd stares...

thanks to this hair..w00t w00t

when you look a certian way, people think your sapose to act that way you look. so i finaly got that look that will let me, unweidrly, act out as a happy go lucky woman! w00t w00t~!

I am writng a musical! The Last Black Vampire, the Nightmare Musical. It's going to be awsome. 80's music the whole shabaang!

i'm cold hold me.

My boyfriend is coming down December 19!but we wont be able to stay at my house.. nope nope.... because i will have

rules..

I don;t mind, a roof under my head is awsome, the room i have is HUDGE, and i have my own bathroom. its a long walk from school so i will be loosing wieght.

tom thank you!

when will the maddness end?

My cell phone works now! thanks for calling baby, i love to hear your voice before i go to sleep.

I wonder if Jilleen, my twin, should read this blog.... nah... it will mean all hell brakes loose..

I want sushi..

" can't you live with your family?"
" can't you get a job?"
"why don't you ask your family for help?"
"Has anyone told you your over dramatic?"
" Have you thought of anti depressants..".

" maybe if you belived in god this wouldnt happen."

damn questions.....damn them...hell no... ARRG!.

Can i get that hug now?

----------> why is it that when i have so much stress on me, and no one around me notices, I just shove it off?.... no one seems to care so why do I?... i don't get " it's all going to be okay?"...at school...

----------> My boyfriend Alex deserves evreything, he helps me, he loves me, he tells me he will take care of me...what does he ask in return?.... you tell me?.... HE is so great. What would i do without him?

Can you see me living back at home? with my mother who wishes death on me, the screams the names, the beats,.... ARRG! OH Thank gackt i was saved. I love you Alex.

I love you so much, you mak emy day complete with your words, you make me smile and laugh. You are everything i wanted and more... these stariptipical words are truth.

--------> embaressed much janelle?

Why should I be?... no reason much? no excuses latly? no wonders of the wrold you question?....

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.I am hungry!